One time I met Ina Garten.

Oh my I love this woman. I have watched her show since High School, I have all of her cookbooks, I literally have had dreams about her. Usually we bump suitcases in the airport and then share a cordial meal at an airport restaurant. I always wake up happy after that. Last week she came to town and I knew I HAD to go see her. She was visiting a local HEB to promote her new line of freezer meals (betrayal!) and was giving away 100 autographed copies of her newest cookbook (which I didn't have). I found out about all of this the night before and I was determined to get one of those cookbooks...until I found out that you had to stand in line to get a ticket for it. Tickets were to be handed out at 6am. Which meant to be safe I needed to be in line around 4:30...and then I wasn't sure if I really wanted to do it. Luckily, I have an awesome friend who kicked me in the tookus and knocked sense into me (thanks Michelle) and a great Mom who watched the boys while I napped later in the day.

To make a long story short - we were the first ones in line, we got the coveted tickets and then came back later that day to meet the lady herself. It was overwhelming. I made her laugh!...at the expense of my chubby baby. Sorry about the fat joke little buddy but it was for INA! One day you'll understand.

Here Michelle and I are in all our delirious, giddy glory. We made quite a few friends in line. Ina brings people together!

Our fellow line friends! We were the youngest there, everyone else was young at heart!

 The lady of the hour! I almost passed out when she came walking towards us. Michelle claims that I screamed as soon as I saw her - I can neither confirm nor deny that statement. But if she came walking toward you in her signature black button-down and black tassel loafers I bet you would too. 

 The woman in line in front of me looked exactly like Ina - do you see her, right next to the iPad in the picture below? Pretty cool. 

 My Mom was able to snag this picture from behind. It was surreal. She was so down to earth and nice. Plus she fawned over my baby - it was absolutely surreal. I think the weirdest part was that I feel like I know her because I've watched her show for so long, but she had no clue who I was. I've seen her face a hundred times but that was the first time she was seeing mine...unless she has dreams about me too?

And here are some professional shots - HEB hired a photographer so I thought I'd share.

If you look in the photo below, my Mom and P are directly above Ina's head.

Here's the line full of crazies who woke up early to see her - and there I am with baby A on the far right  of the photo. All those middle-aged crazies muscled me out of my primo spot when Ina walked out. They figured I was easy to push around because I had a baby in my arms...and they were right. 

And last but not least here is a photo of Baby O on the far left of the picture. He's famous!

After talking to her I honestly almost started crying because I was so overwhelmed. Embarrassing, I know, but I'm trying to keep it real. Ina. You are amazing!

And one more thing - I like to think of funny things to do in different situations that I would never do but still I think it would be funny. I do this for pretty much any situation and any conversation. If we are talking there are probably 10 things I want to say to be funny but I don't because it will most likely come out awkward or creepy. Anyway here is what I came up with for Ina:

1. Bring santa hats and ask her to pose with me for our family Christmas card.

2. Ask when I could come for dinner at her barn in the Hamptons.

3. Introduce my baby as Jeffrey Garten Bentizzle.

4. Ask her for a hug.

5. Reach out to shake her hand, grab it, smell it, and remark "someone was cooking with garlic recently!"

6. Ask to smell her. I just assume she smells like fine french linens, hydrangeas and wine. I guess I'll never know. 

7. Dress exactly like her and then laugh like it was an accident.

8. Tell her that I started a cooking blog inspired by her...oh wait...

9. Give a detailed description of the last dream I had about her.

10. Trace the side of her face slowly with one finger without saying a word and then walk away. 

Obviously I wouldn't do any of those things but wouldn't it be hilarious to watch someone do that? Sorry. I'm so weird. 

INA!